Shards
by AnonymousPhantomer
Summary: It was him, but it wasn't him. He was different, he was the same. He was my best friend, the boy who I had killed a few short months ago. So how was it that he appeared before me, with shards of his memory and no clue who I am? Rated for language.
1. Preface

****This story is not a part of the _Revenge_ series.****  
Hi guys, it's been a while! This is something I came up with a few days ago, and I've just begun working on it. I hope you guys like it.

Sam's POV-

I sat on the top of my roof, trying to look at the stars. The lights from city always made it hard to spot them, but I found that if you looked hard enough, you could pick out of few.  
The cold winter air chilled me down to my bones, but I couldn't find it in myself to feel it. Nor would I feel the warmth of the Spring or the Summer, the crisp of the Fall. All the seasons, all the days had become dead to me.  
This town had also become as such.  
Amity Park was haunted for me. It had been for months now.  
My life since that day had become a cycle of nothing. Nothing but sadness and hurting, and nowhere could I find any comfort.  
I wrapped myself in the small blanket I held around myself, not that it shielded me any better from the cold.  
"Ten, nine, eight, seven," I could hear people counting down to the New Year in the distance.  
I couldn't help it as tears welded up in my eyes as they reached their New Year.  
"ONE!"  
The sky around me lit up with fireworks. The roaring crackles were probably the only thing that could have broken through to me.  
I knew people were celebrating and laughing and kissing, their hopes for this New Year high.  
Every house as far as I could see was lit up like a Christmas tree, every house but one. Fenton Works was dark, just as it had been since they moved away a month before.  
I looked the opposite way to see Tucker's home glowing, but with a new family inside of it. The Foley family had also left this town behind after that day.  
Maybe I should have too, but something about this place compelled me to stay. Maybe it was because it was familiar.  
Maybe it was because my life, whatever my life was, was here.  
Maybe it was because it was the only place that held traces, memories, of the life I used to live.  
A life with my best friend.  
One huge burst of light lit the entire city, and I found my eyes back on the Fenton's old home.  
I slowly stood up, making my way towards the fire escape.  
"Happy New Year, Danny," I breathed as I began my descent.


	2. Fragment

I did my best to avoid the drunken partygoers as I made my way up the street towards the abandoned Fenton home.

Most of them paid me no attention as I walked, and I didn't want the attention either.  
Some who knew me fell silent as I walked by, their stares stabbed at me like knives. I did my best to ignore it, I really did. I tried to tell myself they were just in awe at the spectacular light shows in the sky. I couldn't fool myself, though; the fireworks had already died down.  
This short five-minute walk had become a never-ending journey for me. I made my way up the street towards the house that was once like a second home to me. Now it was just a cruel reminder of the past.  
The "for sale" sign in the front window never failed to stop me in my tracks. I starred at it, willing it to just disappear. Or for me to wake up and realize that it never happened; that the past two and a half months of my life was nothing more than a sick nightmare.  
Snow began to softly drift down from the sky, and I exhaled deeply. My breath misted before me as I reached for the door, slowly pushing it open.  
The hard creaking of the door echoed throughout the dark, empty apartment. I felt along the wall for the light switch and almost tripped in the process.  
I had come here many times in the daytime after the Fenton's had moved, but never at night.  
Once I had successfully illuminated the room, I broke into tears, just as I had every time I came back to this house. I could still visualize the room filled with Mrs. Maddie's furniture, and Mr. Jack's ghost hunting gear spread all over the place.  
I could see Jazz reading a book on the sofa, and the family pictures on the walls. In this empty room, I could envision the way it was supposed to be. Not the way it was now.  
I opened my eyes to the harsh reality that was this empty room, and with no more hesitation, I turned and headed for the basement.  
The steep stairs threatened my safety as I made my way down them in the dark. Not that I cared much for my life anymore, anyway. I never understood the point of putting the light switch for the staircase at the bottom of it. Just another one of Mr. Jack's brilliant ideas I suppose.

The large empty lab had become a point of hell for me. It, just like the rest of the home, mocked me with its emptiness. Where there were once tables and machines, there was now nothing. The only thing that remained was the large ghost portal, sealed shut and plastered with caution tape.  
I went and took my usual spot in front of it, sitting cross-legged and looking at the massive metal door.  
More tears spilled out of my eyes as my mind replayed the events of that day.

***

"_C'mon, Danny, it's cool!_" _I urged him on.  
Danny held the black and white jumpsuit in his hand, nervously eyeing the giant portal before us.  
"I don't know, Sam…" he hesitated. "My parents said not to touch anything don here while they were gone."  
"I'm gonna have to agree with Danny on this one," Tucker followed up. "I don't think we should mess around in here."  
I gaped at them. Just the thought of it, a whole new, unexplored dimension was supposedly behind that door. I couldn't even wrap my brain around the possibilities this opportunity gave us, and both my best friends were too afraid to get near it.  
"Danny, c'mon," I continued. "Don't be such a baby about it!"  
Danny looked at me with a strange expression that I couldn't quite describe. He just slightly smiled at me, and my heart would pick up speed. All I knew was it made me blush when he looked at me that way. I had to turn away.  
Next thing I knew, I could hear a zipper being zipped up. I turned back in shock to see Danny suited, fists tightly clenched. He looked so cute when he was determined.  
I had liked Danny for years, and there were times when I couldn't tell how he felt about me. We were best friends, and I had always thought that was the way it was supposed to be. Yet I still had feelings for him. I couldn't make them go away.  
I flashed him a huge smile. I couldn't hide my excitement. He returned a small one, the fear in his eyes very clear.  
I was beginning to regret asking him to go in there, he was clearly very anxious about it. Tucker seemed just as worried, but neither of them said anything.  
Tucker and I watched as Danny slowly made his way to the large metal door. He lightly pressed a button, causing the door to slowly opening the two massive metal doors of the portal.  
My eyes went wide as…nothing. Nothing was revealed. Nothing amazing or mysterious or magical was behind those doors like I had hoped.  
"Well, there's nothing there!" Tucker chimed, obviously relieved. "Oh well, close it up, Danny."  
I could feel my face fall as Danny looked back at me with sad eyes. He read my disappointment and knew he needed to find a way to get that portal to work for me.  
"Hang on, Tuck," he called.  
"Danny?" Tucker, now sounding frantic. "Where are you going?"  
I looked up to see my best friend slowly step into the darkness of the portal. He was slow in his approach, and I burned with curiosity waiting for something to happen.  
Danny looked back at us still unsure that he wanted to continue. I smiled in encouragement, ignoring whatever expression was plastered onto Tucker's face.  
For a brief moment, Danny's eyes were looking directly into mine, and my face instantly heated up. I couldn't take looking into his ice blue eyes when I knew they were looking into mine.  
He turned away from us and continued further inside of the portal. I watched as his hands traced the walls, feeling his way through the darkness. He was almost out of sight when he called out to us.  
"Guys, there's nothing in here…"  
Disappointment took me again. Maybe I needed to grow up and stop believing in ghosts or a ghost world like I'd heard Danny's family tell me so much about for years.  
"Can you just get out of there?" Tucker called back.  
We watched as Danny's hands used the wall to guide him through the darkness again.  
The last few seconds he was in there, I was waiting for something to happen.  
What actually happened was nothing I ever could have imagined.  
Light. Blinding light.  
Heat. Burning heat.  
Screaming. Deafening screaming.  
I watched as the dark portal exploded into white light. The last thing I saw of Danny was him turning around to see the light erupting from the back of the portal. It was so intense, that Tucker and had to shield our eyes from it. There was so much heat coming from that portal, Tucker had to jump in front of me and cover me. And the screaming was the single most ear piercing noise I will ever have heard in my life.  
Through the ten seconds that the experience lasted, I found myself and Tucker both screaming out "Danny," though we could barely hear each other over Danny's screams.  
And then there was silence.  
And then there was darkness.  
"The power…must be out…" Tucker managed to stutter.  
We were both holding each other and shaking violently.  
Tucker was the first to move. He grabbed his iPhone out of his pocket and opened his flashlight app. The small light led him to the fuse box, where he worked to flip multiple switches.  
Suddenly, the lights came back on. Everything in the lab was still. I opened my eyes testing them to see if I had gone blind from that light. Aside from things being a bit blurry, I could see.  
I looked over to Tucker.  
"You okay?" I asked him.  
"Yeah, and you?" he responded, rubbing his eyes.  
"I'm good. Danny, you o-"  
I was cut off by Tucker's sharp breath.  
My eyes followed his gaze to where the portal was.  
The floor was black and burned, smoke rising off of it. My eyes continued to the inside where my best friend was.  
I've never screamed louder in my life._

***

I forced my eyes open and stood up off of the ground. I didn't even realize I had begun trembling.  
The memory of that day was still so vivid for me. Maybe going and visiting the place where it happened so often was bad for my health.  
But I needed to be close to him. I needed to be able to feel my best friend's presence, and the place where he died seemed like the place I could connect with the easiest.  
The place where I killed my best friend.


	3. Routine

I've decided that my update days for this story will be Fridays. So without further delay, here's chapter two.

School.  
Mostly everybody hates school, mainly because there's always so much work to do. I hated it for different reasons all together.  
I was alone.  
For years, I had my best friends with me every day to make this place so tolerable. Since Danny died and Tucker moved away, I was completely and utterly alone.  
The police promised my family and I that the fact that Tucker and I were involved would be kept a secret. The death was ruled as an accident, and that's truly all it was.

***  
_"Tell us again what happened, Ms. Manson," a police officer looked down at his legal pad full of scribbles, not looking directly at me.  
He seemed dull and uninterested in the situation. I was reaching for another tissue, finishing off the second box that had been provided to me.  
"Why?" I sniffled.  
I couldn't keep telling the same story over and over this way. It had just happened, after all.  
"We need to make sure you and Mr. Foley's story is straight, and then you can go home," he encouraged, still not looking at me. "You two were the only witnesses."  
I inhaled and recalled the story of the accident to him one more time. Tucker had been dismissed long before me.  
The officer occasionally nodded and marked more things down as my story went on. He let me pause and take deep breaths when I needed to. I would collapse every few minutes in the retelling. I was so broken.  
"Thank you for your time," he finally said, reaching his hand out to shake mine. I shook it twice and left the room to find my mother waiting for me._

"_Are you alright, Samantha?" my mother asked.  
I couldn't answer her; I was still so caught up in one fact.  
The officer never looked at me in the eyes.  
I wouldn't have wanted to either._

Had I known any danger could have come out of it, I would have never told Danny to go into the portal. I honestly just wanted to see a ghost. I would have never wanted to kill my best friend.  
I held my English textbook tightly to my chest and made my way into Mr. Lancer's classroom for first period. Same as everyday, I could feel the eyes of everyone in the hallway on me. Judging me. Though I was promised it would remain a secret, somehow everyone found out Tucker and I were there when Danny died.  
No one talked to us anymore, not that they ever did talk to us much to begin with. But after that day, Tucker and I had become completely and totally shunned by everyone in the school. I thought it would be somewhat okay, until I realized not even Tucker wanted to talk to me anymore. Almost nobody wanted anything to do with me anymore.

***  
_The bell rang nosily as the Friday school day ended.  
Normally people ran outside cheering that the week was over. The halls were silent as students poured out of their classrooms and left the building.  
This particular Friday had marked one week since Danny had died. Everyone in the school, even the bullies who had mocked him were somber. Danny had never been much of a standout, but his death scarred this entire town.  
I approached my locker as the intercom rang with the principal's voice.  
"Students, please remember we are holding a memorial in the school auditorium tonight for Daniel Fenton. All are encouraged to attend."  
Ice shot through my veins as his name echoed through the halls. And everyone turned to look at me.  
I stuck my head in my locker as a silent stream of tears began to cascade down my cheeks.  
"Hey, Sam?" Tucker's voice quietly spoke from behind me.  
I hadn't heard Tucker's voice in over a week, and it was heavily laced in grief.  
I turned to face him, not sure how to respond to his simple greeting.  
"I need to talk to you."  
We walked out onto the empty football field. The sky was bright and sunny and the temperature was a hot 85. The football team should have been out there practicing, but they weren't. Every extracurricular activity had been cancelled that week.  
Tucker stopped in the center of the field, and turned to face me. There was no emotion on his face.  
"I can't," he stuttered. "I can't know you anymore."  
Out of everything that I expected to happen, that was not one of them.  
I starred at Tucker, my only friend left in the world, and tried to make sense of what he was saying.  
"You, this place, this accident…it's all so much and I just…I can't handle it anymore. Everything that's happened, everything we lost, it's just all so much."  
"Tucker, I…" I started to say.  
"What Sam," he was suddenly angry. "What? What could you possibly have to say to me? I told you and Danny both going into that portal was a stupid idea. And you didn't listen to me. You told him to go in there, you didn't do a damn thing to prevent that from happening."  
I began to back away from Tucker's booming voice.  
"It's your fault Danny's dead Sam, your fault!" Tucker exploded.  
I stood there, wounded. Tucker had taken a sword to me with his words. He cut open every wound that was still bleeding from the previous week.  
"My family and I are moving out of this town," Tucker spoke again, no emotion in his voice this time. "My parents said I needed to get out of here, this town is too traumatizing for me now. I'm leaving and I don't want any contact with you. Goodbye."  
I watched as Tucker walked away, and out of my life. I watched as my only friend disappeared out of my sight._

The sound of someone slamming his or her locker doors snapped me back to reality. These fragments of memories, these _shards_ often took over my mind and forced me to watch my life unravel again and again. It was a nightmare.  
My life was a nightmare.  
My legs carried me to my first period class as I did everything I could to keep my mind focused on the present. It took all of my concentration to make it to the desk in the middle of two empty ones. Desks that used to be occupied by my best friends.  
Mr. Lancer dragged himself into the classroom and began his role call. I slumped into my seat as he skipped their names looking out the window. The skies grew dark and stormy.  
"Ms. Manson?" Mr. Lancer called.  
All eyes in the room turned to face me.  
"I'm here," I answered quietly, same as I did every time.  
The rest of class dragged on. A group assignment was given out, and no one even glanced at me until they all had partners of their own.  
I sighed and started to read the textbook, hoping no one would continue to look at me.  
Mr. Lancer surprised me by softly clearing his throat.  
"Sam, do you want me to pair you up with someone?" he asked politely. "I can make an exception for a group of three."  
Mr. Lancer's words thrust me into my own world. Suddenly everything around me changed.

***  
_"I call Sam!" Danny said, pulling my right arm.  
"No way dude, you got Sam last time," Tucker responded, tugging my left arm the other way.  
I sat there in the middle being pulled both ways and laughed. I loved my boys, especially when they fought over me.  
There was an uneven number of students in the class, and everybody in the class already had their partners.  
"Tuck, you can totally do this on your own!" Danny continued to whine and pull me in his direction.  
Truthfully, I would have much rather worked with Danny than Tucker. It wasn't because I had any problems with Tucker, but rather because I had come to accept that I secretly liked Danny. Not that I would ever tell him, of course.  
"I can't read Shakespeare and you know it!" Tucker countered. "I'm a techno geek, not an English geek."  
I was so out of it that I hadn't even noticed the whole class was watching the debate.  
"Look, two losers fighting over one loser," Paulina snickered.  
Most of the class laughed as Dash and Kwan placed money bets on who would win me in the final outcome.  
Mr. Lancer startled the entire class by dropping a heavy textbook onto his desk.  
"Enough!" he shouted.  
Every student in the class turned to face forward and Mr. Lancer slowly approach our group of desks.  
"Mr. Foley, Mr. Fenton," he began. "I'll have you know that this class is a serious matter and there is no time for your childish antics."  
"But there's an uneven number in the class," Tucker informed him. "One person will be left out."  
Mr. Lancer looked down with little sympathy for Tucker or Danny. He knew I could have easily done the assignment on my own.  
"Very well," he said. "Ms. Manson, you may choose who you will work with."  
I didn't want to choose between my two best friends, my two only friends. My first choice would have been Danny, but maybe that would have hinted at too much. And if I chose Tucker, would it have offended Danny?  
"I, uh," I spoke quietly, still debating.  
Mr. Lancer decided that there wasn't enough time for my stuttering.  
"Alright, the three of you can work together," he finally said, knowing he would regret the decision. "But just this once."  
Danny and Tucker both sighed in relief as Mr. Lancer turned and walked back to his desk.  
After that day, every time a group project came along, the three of us became the one exception. Most of the other kids in the class complained and tried to pair groups of three, but Mr. Lancer would never allow it. He got on our nerves sometimes, but I felt like Mr. Lancer liked the three of us, deep down.  
_***

"SAM," Mr. Lancer was gently shaking me.  
My eyes flew open, and I was thrust back into reality. I looked around, frantic. The classroom had been emptied and Mr. Lancer was accompanied but the school nurse, who was fanning me.  
My face grew hot as I lowered my head in embarrassment.  
"Sam, that's the fourth time this month that you've zoned out on us like that," Mr. Lancer said, concerned.  
"I know, I'm sorry," I said sheepishly. "I can't help it…"  
The school nurse ceased her fanning and began to write in her little pink notebook she always carried around. I watched her for a second, and then diverted my eyes to the window outside. I hadn't even noticed it had begun to rain outside.  
"We can't keep ignoring this problem," Mr. Lancer continued. "It's beginning to worry all the school administration and staff. We need to call your parents to-"  
"NO!" I instantly protested.  
The last thing I wanted was for my parents to become involved. They hated me enough for what had happened.  
"You can't tell them," I begged. "I'll do anything, just please don't tell them. I can't deal with that, they can't know. Please, they can't know."  
I began shaking. It took everything I had not to break down and cry.  
"Samantha, calm down," Mr. Lancer urged. "Your parents will understand. You experienced something very traumatic and we are all here to help and support you through this tough time in your life."  
I ignored his kind words.  
"They can't know! They'll disown me or something…I don't know. Please don't tell them."  
I could feel myself getting hysterical, and yet I could do nothing to stop it. The room around me was getting smaller. My lungs were getting tighter, and it was getting harder to breathe. Every sound around me became amplified; the ticking of the wall clock, the whispers of my classmates in the hallway, the nurse's pen hitting the paper of her little pink notebook. The world around me started spinning as I realized I was having an anxiety attack.  
"Calm down, Ms. Manson," Mr. Lancer, now frantic. "Breathe in and out, in and out."  
I could hear his words. I tried so hard to listen. But I could feel myself slipping further and further away from him and the nurse.  
Suddenly, a firm hand grasped my shoulder, and the scene around me returned to normal. I fought to control my breathing as my eyes met the nurses. She was starring back straight into my eyes as she slowly took her hand off of me.  
We never broke the connection of our eyes while she reached down and gently ripped a sheet of paper out of her notebook and handed back to me.  
I took it and studied the writing on the page.  
_Dr. Tessa Wells  
Psychologist / Therapy Services  
1-555-837-2938  
_My eyes again met with hers as she began to speak for the first time.  
"You should contact her and make an appointment," she explained. "These symptoms you're showing, it's far beyond what anyone here at Casper High can help you with."  
Mr. Lancer's eyes shifted back and fourth between the two of us, I never looked back at him. Before I could ask or say anything, the nurse continued.  
"She'll keep everything confidential, your parents won't have to know anything."  
I nodded, and folded the paper as I inserted it into my backpack. Whether I would actually call the doctor or not remained up in the air.  
Mr. Lancer and the nurse stayed with me for a few more minutes before determining that I was okay to continue with class for the day.  
Eventually the students filtered back in, and Mr. Lancer continued lecturing without even mentioning the group work again. I was thankful for that.  
The day continued on as every day for me did. It was all a blur of going to classes and not paying attention to the lessons, but more so of paying attention to everything around me, making sure the shards of memories wouldn't take over me again. The shards that now ruled my life.  
I walked to lunch alone as I did every day. As I stopped by my locker, I could hear the popular kids gossip about me.  
"There's the freak," Paulina commented.  
"God, she's so weird," Starr agreed.  
I let their words pierce me as I tried to tune them out, but I knew I needed to keep my head in the present. I could not afford to slip up again, not after I had slipped so early in the day already. I still had three hours of school to face after lunch, anyway.  
"Guys, maybe we shouldn't be so mean to her," Kwan, the only good-hearted one of them all commented. "After all, she did kill Fenton. That's rough to live with."  
"Kwan, you only feel bad because you hit a dog the first time you drove a car," Dash commented. "That bitch killed an actual person…well, if you can count Fenton as an actual person."  
I slammed my locker shut. I had had enough; they could bad-mouth me all they wanted (and they did, every day) but they could not talk about Danny. Even in his death, they were still so cruel to him.  
I turned to face them, their eyes all on me from the slamming of my locker. Paulina looked at me with her eyebrows raised, not sure what to expect. Dash looked uninterested. Starr looked quizzically at me. Kwan looked genuinely terrified.  
"You do not talk about Danny like that," I warned them, acid dripping from my words.  
They all starred at me wide eyed, and they had reason to. It was the first time I had spoken to any of them in mouths, and my tone truly was frightening. I could have been scared of myself had I not been so heated in the moment.  
"None of you ever fucking talk about him again," I said. "Not unless you're going to talk about how great he was. But none of you assholes have any right to disrespect him."  
Dash was the first to recover. He shook his head and composed himself.  
"Excuse us," he said sarcastically.  
I glared as he got down on his knees and look up to me pleading.  
"I beg your forgiveness," Dash cried. "I'm simply not worthy to speak of Fenton in your presence."  
Paulina caught on quickly. She knew the game Dash was playing. I suddenly regretted speaking out.  
"But wait, Dash," she matched his tone. "Why should we be begging forgiveness from the girl who is responsible for what happened?"  
Starr and Kwan stayed behind the leaders. Whether they didn't dare stand against me after I stood up, or felt sorry for me, I'll never know. All I could focus on was Dash slowly rising to his feet as he and Paulina continued their counter attack.  
"What ever are you talking about, Paulina?"  
"Oh Dash, didn't you hear? It was all over the news just a few short months ago!"  
I began backing up; there was no way to brace myself for what they were about to say. They followed my movements until my back was pressed against the lockers on the opposite side of the hall. I was cornered, and I was about to pay for speaking out against them.  
"Remind me, please!" Dash said, aiming for the kill.  
"That bitch right there," Paulina smiled. "She killed poor little Danny."  
Her words were sharper than any blade could have ever been.  
"Ah, Fenton," Dash continued. "I believe this was his locker right here…"  
He patted the locker. And that was it, I was gone.


	4. Lights

***  
_"Like, seriously, who would wear that hideous skirt every day?" Paulina taunted me.  
Dash and Paulina looked down at me evilly. They had me cornered against my locker, no one else in the hallway to stop the bullying.  
I had just finished writing a paper in the library, and I regretted staying after school. I finished right at the end of cheerleader and football practice. It was perfect timing, making me the perfect victim for them.  
I stood silent as they continued their insults, trying to think of a good comeback. They hit me from every angle, it was hard to think.  
"And what's with this Gothic shit act you play?" Dash laughed.  
"You don't need all black to be the freak girl of Casper," Paulina added. "You're hideous enough."  
I liked to think of myself as individualistic and I was pretty proud of that. But when I had people attacking me this way, it was hard to keep a straight face. I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.  
'Do NOT give them the satisfaction of you crying' I thought to myself.  
With their every word, it was getting harder.  
"That's enough," a new voice came from behind them.  
Both Dash and Paulina turned to see Danny standing behind them, glaring. He was significantly smaller than Dash, but he still forced himself to look brave.  
Danny's cold eyes met my tear-filled ones. I shook my head at him; I tried to telepathically tell him to get away. Dash had physically beaten Danny so many times; I couldn't stand to see it happen because of me.  
"Where the fuck did you come from, Fenton?" Dash asked, now smiling at Danny.  
Danny didn't even flinch.  
"Tutoring, where you probably should be too considering your math grades," Danny replied, now glaring back up at Dash.  
Paulina giggled at Danny's comment, and Dash's smiled instantly disappeared. He lunged for Danny, grabbing him and holding him up by the collar of his T-shirt.  
"Listen here, Fenturd," Dash's tone was now menacing. "I was perfectly content with making your little bitch miserable for today, but you're gonna pay for your smartass comment."  
Paulina and I both took a step back. We were both afraid of how dark Dash sounded.  
Dash threw Danny against the lockers I had been standing against a few seconds prior. The force knocked the breath out of Danny and Dash cracked his knuckles in preparation.  
Anger suddenly took over me. I jumped at Dash and wrapped around his stomach with my legs while I clawed at his face. I was not one for fighting, but I would not sit there and let Dash beat my best friend if I could have done anything about it.  
"OW!" Dash wailed. "GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME!"  
I ignored his cry, and kept clawing. I was hoping Danny was running away while I held onto Dash.  
Suddenly, without warning, Paulina grabbed at my waist and pried me off of Dash. For a second, I could see the damage I had inflicted upon his face. There were multiple scratches, and some of them were bleeding. I had every intent of making more. Before I could react to Paulina, Dash grabbed me and threw me to the ground. I landed on my left shoulder weirdly and cried in pain. Something was wrong. I grabbed at it and began to back away from the two.  
"GOD DAMNIT, DASH!" Danny roared from behind them. "WHY THE FUCK WOULD YOU HIT A GIRL?!"  
I watched as Danny's fist connected with Dash's face, and Dash was actually forced a few steps back. Danny grabbed his fist and pursed his lips. He had hit Dash so hard, his had actually sprained a knuckle.  
If Dash was angry before, he was furious now. He rebounded and pushed Danny back into the lockers, and began punching him.  
I started to get up again, but Paulina knelt beside me and stopped me.  
"Sam," she breathed. "stay out of it."  
There was no sympathy in her voice, nor was there remorse. I had never seen a nice side to Paulina, but something in that moment told me she was protecting me, like she didn't want me to get hurt again. Or maybe because she didn't want to get in anymore trouble than she had potentially been in. Regardless, she put her hand on my good shoulder and turned away. She knew that once Dash started, there was no stopping him.  
"You and that damn freak better not stand up to me again," Dash said when he was done his assault.  
Dash let go of his shirt, and Danny fell to the floor, out of breath.  
"Let's go, Paulina," Dash ordered.  
Paulina popped up instantly, and the two of them walked out of the school together without looking back.  
Meanwhile, I crawled over to Danny who was heaving, and looked him over. He had bruises all over his face and arms. His nose was bleeding slightly, and he a huge black eye, all because he stood up for me. The tears that didn't fall earlier began to escape now.  
"Danny, why did you do that?" I asked him.  
He gave me a small smile.  
"How's your shoulder feel?" he ignored my question; it was typical Danny, always putting other people ahead of himself.  
The second Danny asked me that, I was reminded of the pain in my shoulder. It stung badly, and my arm instantly reached for it.  
He sighed and pushed himself to sit up. He gently removed my hand from the shoulder and looked at it.  
"It's dislocated," he whispered. "We have to go to a hospital to get it taken care of."_  
_Danny stood up and very gently helped me stand up as well._ _He guided me to the exit of the school and we made our way towards Amity Park's hospital.  
"Why did you do that?" I repeated my question. "Why did you stand up for me?"  
"Because they were wrong," he replied.  
"Wrong about what?" I was confused.  
He kept his eyes forward, and a smile appeared on his face.  
"You're not hideous. You're beautiful."  
_***

I was brought back to reality by the booming sound of Dash's laughter.  
"THAT BITCH IS ON DRUGS OR SOMETHING," he roared. "SHE CAN'T EVEN GO AN HOUR WITHOUT COMPLETELY ZONING OUT!"  
The others all laughed as I realized what was going on around me. I was in the bully circle, and Danny couldn't save me this time.  
But then I realized, this was every day.  
Every day of my life had repeated this cycle. I would go to school and be judged and bullied because they all knew I was the one who told Danny to go into the stupid portal. And I would lose my mind the second something that reminded me of Danny would present itself. And now people were telling me I needed to seek mental help.  
I was done. I was done with this school. I was done with the people here.  
I was done with this life.  
I broke out of the circle and pushed my way past everyone in the halls. I ran as fast as I could, ignoring that everyone was watching me.  
I burst out of the school's front entrance and into the pouring rain. The freezing air and wind didn't stop me and I ran towards my destination, Fenton Works.  
I didn't care what they would say about me. I didn't care if anyone would miss me. I didn't care that I didn't care. I just wanted it to end. I just wanted it all to go away. I just wanted to end my life.  
And I knew the best way to do it, would be the same way I ended Danny's life, in that fucking portal. I would do it the same way. A worthless life for a beautiful life.  
Lightning lit up the sky and thunder cracked as if the storm was trying to warn me to turn back or to stop me. I ignored it.  
I passed through the streets and dodged cars as I ran out in front of them. Fenton Works was off in the distance and I could see it.  
Somewhere in the back of my mind, I became aware of everything around me. This would be the last time I would walk down this street. The last time I would feel the cold, the rain, and the wind. The last time I would ever hear the thunder or see the city. All of it would soon be gone. I would soon be gone.  
It didn't bother me one bit.  
I eagerly opened the door and slammed it shut, not even bothering turning on the lights. I knew they would go out from the power surge I was about to create. With any luck, I would be dead within the next five minutes.  
And no one would have been there to turn out the lights.


	5. Life & Death

The Fenton portal still covered in caution tape. The police hadn't even bothered to clean up their crime scene garbage. Or maybe it was still there to warn people (people like me) to stay away from the dangerous machine.  
I ripped away at the tape, not caring about any penalties that might befall me because of it.  
Nothing would find me after this, anyway.  
I took a few moments to contemplate what I was doing here. I was about to kill myself. Could I truly go through with this? Something had to be said about my sanity considering I was going to do it the same way Danny died. I doubted I could really go through with it.  
And I knew it was going to hurt. I remembered the way Danny was screaming…  
The room began to spin. I was losing myself.

***  
_Steam continued to rise off of the burned body of my best friend.  
"FUCK!" Tucker screamed as soon as I stopped screaming.  
He pulled out his phone, hands shaking, as he dialed 911.  
I stayed frozen in my spot on the floor, not able to take my eyes off of Danny's burned body. Tears and sobs shook my entire frame.  
I could hear Jazz's frantic footsteps running down the stairs towards us.  
"What's going on?!" she demanded before she had made it to us.  
Neither Tucker or myself could not turn to face her, but we heard her gasp and scream. I could even hear Tucker urgently speaking to the paramedics. The noises seemed so far away for me.  
My eyes stayed glued to Danny, who was trembling.  
And then it hit me; he was shaking. He was breathing.  
He was fucking alive.  
Still shaking, I forced myself to crawl towards him.  
The closer I got to him, the more I could see was wrong.  
He was lying in the most twisted position I had ever seen a human lay in. I wasn't entirely sure that most of his muscles could bend the ways that they were bent. His face was covered in burns and blood. The jumpsuit he was wearing was torn and burned, exposing his skin in many areas.  
I chocked at this portrait of this grotesque portrait of my best friend- no, this boy that I loved.  
I loved him, and look at what I had done to him.  
His entire body was shaking less by the time I reached him, and his breathing was becoming more erratic.  
Very lightly, I placed my shaking hand on his shaking shoulder.  
"Danny," I somehow managed to whisper.  
He responded by turning his head towards me, and coughing up blood. I retracted my hand, scared that I had caused that by my gentle touch.  
Danny's face was so badly damaged. It was burned and I almost couldn't tell it was him.  
Slowly, his eyes fluttered open. His ice blue eyes remained the same.  
"Sam," my name fell from his trembling lips, paired with a weak smile.  
The weakest, most beautiful smile I had ever seen in my life.  
New tears welded up in my eyes.  
"I'm here, best friend," I cried. "I'm here."  
He startled me by lightly laughing.  
"Best friends," he sighed. "I don't know about that one."  
Through all the pain I felt, I looked at him confused.  
"I always figured we were more is all," he explained, closing his eyes.  
"No, Danny, no," I was suddenly urgent, and I shook him lightly. "Keep your eyes open. Don't you close them."  
He forced them open again.  
"Why?" he asked. "I want to be sure the last thing I see is your face."  
Ice shot through every vein of my body.  
'The last thing I see is your face. The last thing I see. The last thing.'  
"No, this isn't it," I was frantic now. "This isn't the end of your life, Danny."  
He drew the deepest breath I've ever seen anyone take.  
"You know, Sam," he said. "I've always wanted to tell you that I loved you, but until now, I was never strong enough, and-"  
He was cut off when he began to cough again, more blood spilled out of his mouth. His eyes shut tight, and I grabbed his hand and squeezed it to let him know I was still there.  
His eyes slowly reopened, and I watched his pupils fail to dilate.  
He stopped shaking. His chest failed to rise again.  
His hand fell out of mine._

I crashed back into reality screaming.  
These memories. These shards. They were the only push I needed. I needed them to go away. They had driven me to insanity.  
The shards of my memory had fucking taken over my life. They reminded me daily of why I was the worst person in the world. And why I didn't deserve to be alive anymore.  
My eyes began to search for the button to open the large portal doors. As I remembered, it was located right on the side. I hit the button harder than necessary, hoping it would still work enough to open it.  
There was a loud screeching noise as the doors protested to open. The now-rusted metal scrapped against its metal frame.  
I looked into the dark hole, trying not to look down at the floor. Despite my best efforts, my eyes fell to the charred floor, and the unburned outline of the body that had lain there.  
I held my breath as I fell to my knees right next to it, next to him.  
"I'm coming," I whispered down to the floor.  
Wasting no more time, I rose and looked for whatever Danny had hit, making the accident happed. I looked as hard as I could, trying to see through the dark. Slowly, my eyes adjusted, and I was able to make out a clear handprint on the walls of the portal. It covered a large green button that said _ON_.  
So that was what happened; Danny had activated the portal while still inside of it.  
My hand, smaller in comparison to the handprint that marked the burned wall, covered the button.  
I could feel myself breathing heavier than normally. I could feel the shards reaching out for me again as Danny's screaming began to ring in the back of my mind.  
I fought with everything I could to stay in the present moment, when I realized that I was about to end the present.  
Without any more hesitation, I closed my eyes and slammed down on the button.  
Waiting.  
Silence.  
Stillness.  
Darkness.  
Nothing had happened. Absolutely nothing.  
Everything around me was still as I opened my eyes.  
I looked back to the button and pressed it again, desperate.  
Still nothing.  
My hand began consistently raining down on that damn button, praying that a spark would ignite the portal. Praying for the death that I so badly deserved.  
When I realized nothing would happen, I began to back away from the button.  
Was this my punishment? Not being able to die? Having to live with this sick guilt forever?  
There had to be something I was doing wrong.  
I ran to the outside of the portal, looking for instructions, details, something that would tell me how to turn the damn thing on.  
It was nothing but dark as I tried to find something in the lab. Maybe I should have worried about the lights after all.  
My eyes caught sight of a wire that was connected to the frame of the portal. I traced the large cord all the way to a large generator where…it wasn't plugged in.  
I had to plug the fucking thing in so I could die. That was all.  
Strangely eager, I grabbed the cord and plugged in into the metal box power source.  
Still. Fucking. Nothing.  
"Damn it," I muttered under my breath. "Damn it, damn it, damn it."  
I was desperate for this. I was desperate for this escape. I needed this portal to work.  
I began to press every button on the generator, hoping something would happen. My palms rained down on every switch and knob available.  
And without warning, I hit one switch, springing the generator to life. The hum of the large motor inside was quite possibly the best noise I had ever heard in my life.  
But that noise was suddenly drowned by a louder noise.  
The sound of an explosion rocked the entire lab. But it wasn't quite that; it was the sound of a dimension being ripped open…  
The room shook, and suddenly there was so much light, I had to cover my eyes, even though I wasn't directly facing the source.  
And then everything grew quite again. The only noise to fill the room was the steady humming of the generator behind me.  
I opened my eyes and they slowly adjusted to a now eerie glow that consumed the whole room.  
The portal sat there, wide open, with a strange green shield of light.  
Was this light what killed Danny?  
I approached it, and slowly raised my hand towards the green light. I expected it to be solid, I expected there to be pain.  
My hand went threw the light, and it was freezing. The shock of the sudden chill forced my hand out and away from the light. When I pulled it back, I noticed a strange flowing green mist emanating off of my fingers. I watched it, wide-eyed until it quickly faded away.  
What was this? Did Danny freeze to death in this light?  
No, it couldn't have been that. He was burned, and he was in pain. Aside from the chill, there was no pain in my hand.  
I waited a few moments, until my hand reached its regular temperature, and reached back into the light. I pushed through until my elbow was engulfed in the light.  
Again, there was cold, but no pain.  
I quietly debated whether or not to jump into the light. It was not transparent, nor could I see my hand through it. But I did know it would be cold enough to eventually kill me. If I exposed my body long enough to this severe temperature drop, I would eventually catch hypothermia and die.  
Maybe it wasn't the same was as him, but it was the same spot.  
I was cut off when I felt something absolutely freezing squeeze my wrist.  
By force of habit, I tried to pull my arm back, but whatever was holding it had it tight.  
I began to scream, my fight or flight response kicked in. I grabbed on to the frame of the portal and fought to pull my arm back.  
"LET GO!" I yelled urgently at whatever was hold me.  
My feet began to slide towards the light. The mysterious force was winning.  
"STOP!" I screamed.  
Summoning all my strength, I gave one final pull on my arm. The opposing force disappeared, and my arm shot out of the light. Whatever was holding me came out too, and flew through the air over my head. Before anything else, I ran to the side of the portal door and slammed my hand down on the close button. Slowly, the green light faded away as it was sealed behind the large metal doors.  
And darkness filled the room again.  
I noticed that the whole room had dropped in temperature. Maybe it was from the chill of that strange green light.  
Either way, I decided it was time to turn on the lights. I started feeling my way on the walls for a switch when I stopped dead in my tracks.  
The same green glowing light caught the corner of my eye. It was a much smaller source than the door, but it was the same nonetheless.  
My face turned slowly to meet the source of it. A pair of small green orbs were looking at me. They were the only things I could see in the dark.  
The closer I looked, the more they resembled eyes to me.  
And that's what they were; glowing green eyes.  
My eyes stayed locked on these eyes, and they stayed locked on me. Someone was in this room with me. But these eyes a multitude of emotions in them, with curiosity burning in them.  
I was too afraid to move. I didn't know what to do. I wanted to run but I was dead bolted to the ground I stood on.  
Still, I knew I had to do something. My hands silently felt the wall for the light switch as my eyes stayed locked on the other pair across the room from me.  
When my finger finally found the switch, I could not force myself to flip it; I was afraid of what the light could reveal to me.  
Without warning, the pair of eyes began to move. They rose, as if whomever they belonged to was standing up. The movement of my guest suddenly triggered all of my muscles in my hand.  
I flipped the light switch.  
As my eyes adjusted, my legs failed to support me anymore.


	6. The Other Side

Danny's POV-

Cold.  
That's all I had known since the day I'd arrived in this strange world.  
Cold.  
It consumed me, all day every day. Cold radiated throughout my body every second. But it never really bothered me. While I missed the heat, cold was all I could feel. And I liked feeling.  
I spent every day of the past two months wondering this haunting mess of a world, if I could even call it a world. It was like some fucked up spiritual plane or whatever.  
The sky was always green and black. Strange rocks floated in the air, along with a mixture of doors. The doors, I had come to discover, were gateways to other dimensions. And I had spent almost every day of my past three months here trying to find one of these doors to lead me to a home.  
I know things about myself.  
One, my name is Danny Fenton. I have a mother, Maddie, a father, Jack, and a sister, Jazz. My parents, obsessed with ghosts and ghost hunting. Two, I wasn't a very popular kid growing up; I got bullied a lot. Three, I had best friends, but I don't remember them very much. Four, I was in love with a girl, but I don't know who she is. And five, I'm no longer alive.  
How could I be? This strange world I had been trapped in for months, it was full of ghosts. And I had become one of them.  
I don't remember how I died. I don't remember much of anything. Sometimes I feel like it's going to come to me, and then it just goes away. I only have shards of memories pertaining to my human life. It's incredibly fucking frustrating.  
My days were spent floating through this void, opening doors and trying to find some sense of a place to belong. I avoided all the other ghosts I saw, mainly out of fear. True, I was dead, so there was nothing they could do to me. But I had come to realize that I could feel pain. And there was so much I still had to learn about this world. It was just better to stay unnoticed.  
In my months here, I had grown to understand things about myself as a ghost.  
I could fly. This was how I had done all of my traveling. It also made door exploration a possibility. I liked being able to fly. I didn't like the price I had to pay for it.  
I could sense when other ghosts were near. This ability had saved my ass more times than I could count. This strange blue fog stuff would escape from my mouth informing me of another ghost's presence. I took that as my notification to hide. Though I'm sure they could sense me as well, none of them ever really bothered to look for me.  
Most of the hiding I did as made possible by my abilities to turn intangible and invisible. Passing through stuff was pretty damn sweet, but it also felt insanely weird. I much preferred invisibility. The power to be unseen…it was almost like my entire high school career up until my death.  
Of course, if I needed to defend myself, I could have used this ghost ray I had. It was like a laser I could shoot right out of my hand. But I didn't know how far that could get me, so I didn't dare to try it.  
All of these things made me who I was, or who I had become.  
Danny Fenton was gone. Now I was Danny Phantom.

***

I woke up from a somewhat deep sleep. It was still dark out. Well, it's always dark here. There wasn't a way for me to tell time.  
Stretching my arms and legs out before me, I groggily sat up and examined the air around me. No ghosts were around, that I could see anyway.  
I casually hovered away from my rock, lazily looking at all of the doors before me. Who knew where I was going to end up today?  
The first door I found was made of steel. It had large bolts on it, and it looked like it was sealed off. I grabbed the handle and opened the door gently, peaking in through the portal. It revealed nothing but darkness. I decided against investigating any further.  
What felt like hours passed. I opened door after door, looking into the worlds they connected to. None of them seemed like they fit me.  
Two weeks before, there was one I liked in particular. I had stumbled upon a quiet little cozy cabin, somewhere in a mountainous terrain. I curiously stuck my head inside and looked around. The room seemed quiet enough, so I stepped through, leaving the door open behind me. I saw a small Christmas tree and dozens of presents under it. Christmas lights twinkled all around the room, and soft Christmas music played in the background. I guessed it was Christmas time. And I could see family pictures decorating the mantle over the fireplace. It was so strange to me. It didn't feel like a home, but it was a home. It was warm there, and I could tell there was happiness to be found in this simplistic life. I didn't want to leave it, but I could hear the sounds of the family stirring in the other parts of the cabin. So I jumped back through my portal door and closed it tightly. I hadn't gone back through since, but I kept a mental note of that door's location.  
I thought about that place a lot. I knew that if I could never find what I was truly looking for, perhaps I would return there. Perhaps I could live there. It seemed inviting enough. And I didn't suspect the family would mind if they didn't even know I was there.  
I was so distracted by these thoughts that I hadn't even paid attention to where I had been flying.  
I barely missed being hit by some form of energy beam that was obviously meant to hit me.  
"YOU THERE!" a voice boomed from behind me.  
Shit. My first ghost encounter, and whoever it was sounded pretty pissed. What had I done wrong?  
I turned to face a large ghost. He was probably the most terrifying one I had ever seen in my months of living here. He wore a large mechanical suit of armor, equipped with guns and missiles. His face was shaped like a skull, and his hair was made of green flames, to match his huge green eyes.  
"Do you realize where you are?" he questioned, harsh.  
I backed away from him slowly.  
"No," I answered honestly. "I'm just lost…"  
"Look below you, welt," he instructed.  
My eyes fell upon a large jungle island. The jungle was topped off by a large mountain in the shape of a skull. I had never seen this place before, nor did I know where it was.  
"This is Skulker's territory," he continued when my eyes met his again. "You are trespassing on my territory."  
"I'm sorry," I apologized sincerely. "Like I said, I'm lost and I don't know the-"  
He ignored me and raised one of his canons to me.  
"I don't accept apologies," he said taking his aim on me. "I'll take you mounted on above my fireplace as a trophy!"  
He shot a missile straight at my chest. I don't know how, reflex maybe, but I managed to turn intangible and let the missile pass right through my body.  
Without another word, I took off, flying away from Skulker as fast as I could. My ghost sense went off, informing me he was following me. This fact was confirmed when another missile shot right passed me.  
"RUN WHILE YOU CAN, WELT!" he shouted from behind me. "I LIKE THE HUNT."  
I didn't know where to go. I passed countless doors, thinking about hoping through any of them. But what good could that do? He could just follow me through any of them.  
Basically, I was fucked.  
Shot after shot, somehow, I was lucky enough to dodge them all. And he was ruthlessly firing away from behind me.  
Was this how all the ghosts here were? Beyond reason? This guy was insane! He was literally trying to kill me because I floated over his damn island. Not exactly a just cause for murder, if murdering a ghost was even possible. But with the way I was being hunted, it sure seemed like it was.  
I could feel him gaining on me, and I knew if he caught me, I was done for. My only option was to fight back.  
I turned, stunned by how close he was to me, and summoned all my energy to my hands. I shot the biggest ecto blast I could manage, and it hit him with some force. He was thrown backwards, and I continued my mad escape forwards, as fast as I could manage.  
That was when I saw it. A new door, one that I knew I had never seen before, and yet…there was something about it that I knew. Something about it that seemed familiar. Its giant octagon steel frame, its black and yellow steel doors, something. Something about this door was calling to me.  
I knew that no matter what it took, I had to find a way to get into that door. But it was sealed shut.  
Suddenly, there was pain in my chest. I had forgotten about Skulker following me, until he had successfully hit me with one of his lasers.  
My hands flew to my chest, which was now sore and burning.  
It didn't take the hunter long to take advantage of my pause. He flew up to me in blinding speed and raised his gun to me, ready to finish me off.  
I looked up at him, pleading. It was a mistake, that's all it was.  
"Any last words, ghost child?" he asked, charging his weapon.  
There was nothing but stillness as I looked at the barrel of the gun pointed directly at me. This was it. I had died once, and now I was going to die again.  
Without any warning, the sealed doors beside me opened. I starred in shock, and Skulker did too. The door revealed nothing but light.  
Ever so slowly, a small hand, as if it was meant to save me, reached out through the light. Before I could react, it retraced and was gone.  
The portal stayed open, though.  
I contemplated several actions. One, I could stay there until Skulker killed me. Two, I could jump through the portal, and Skulker could kill me there. Three, I could try to fly away as quickly as possible and hope I could somehow get luck enough to lose him. Four, I could do nothing and hope he would just go away.  
Option number three sounded the best to me.  
As I braced myself to speed off, Skulker refocused his attention on me, aiming again.  
"Don't even try to run, welt," Skulker commanded.  
I knew this was it. Only a miracle was going to save my life. Or afterlife? Well, I guess it wasn't the best time for jokes.  
Then, a miracle happened.  
That tiny little hand forced its way through the light again, palm open. It was like I was meant to grab it.  
And I did.  
I snatched that small hand without thinking and prepared to jump through to meet whoever owned it.  
Skulker had other plans.  
He grabbed my arm, tugging me back, and I could feel the hand pulling back as well. It was tug-o-war, and I was the prize. Each opposing side used excessive force. I only prayed that before I was torn in half, the small hand could somehow out tug this massive ghost.  
I held on to that hand as tight as I could.  
But then I remembered, I could shoot energy from my hands. I had done it before, and now seemed like the perfect time to do it again.  
I looked back at Skulker, and smiled darkly. He wasn't going to fucking win.  
I extended my palm facing him, and fired with as much strength as I could. His hand instantly released mine, and for a split second, everything was still. But before I could breathe, the other hand pulled me back with so much force, I was sent flying into a strange dark room.  
I crashed into a wall, seeing the portal I had just passed through closing. Wherever I was, I was stuck here.  
And there was nothing but darkness, but my eyes could see through the dark better than other people.  
I could make out a figure in this room with me. Who it was, I couldn't tell. But I watched as this person slowly moved across the wall through the darkness, searching for something.  
I tried not to move. I tried to do everything I could to keep my presence hidden. Maybe then this person would go away and I could search for some answers.  
There was a clicking sound.  
There was light in the room.  
There was a girl looking at me.  
Before I could react in any way, this girl fell forward. I jumped forward and caught her before she could hit the ground and placed her down gently.  
I had to leave. I had to get out of there. I wasn't even there for two minutes, and I had already caused a girl to faint.  
I fully intended to leave. To make a desperate escape before I could cause any more problems. But before I moved, my eyes found themselves looking at her face.  
I looked back at her, I knew this girl. I knew this face. Her name evaded me, though.  
I couldn't leave her here to wake up alone. What kind of person would that make me?  
So I would wait for her to wake up, try to answer any questions she had, and see if she would answer any of mine.  
How long would it take for her to wake up, any way?


End file.
